"Are you my Fluffer?"
I guess I can kind of relate to this situation. I haven't had a "boyfriend" in a very long time. My last relationship was long distance, so he wasn't exactly there to take me to dinner, tell me what's wrong with my car, or hang things on my wall. I've always counted on my two best guy friends for those kind of things...I frequently bring them as my "plus one" to various work and family events.
I've never really thought that might be unfair to my friend, so oopsies. All the work of being a boyfriend, none of the benefits.
So, Pinata: Thanks for always fixing my car and checking my oil/tires, for taking me to dinner, and for attending any and all events I ask you to!
P.S. I know you've thought about having sex with me.